Growing Up Autistic {Book Review}

Growing Up Autistic (finding your way with simple strategies) is the brand new upcoming book from autistic author Niamh Garvey, illustrated by Rebecca Burgess, due to be published on 19th November 2026. It's written directly for autistic children and young people, packed with practical ideas and strategies to help them cope better in life, and it is a great follow up to their first book in this style called Being Autistic (And What That Actually Means) for children, which came out in 2024. Here's my review of that: Being Autistic {Book Review}. This new book picks up where that one left off: once you know you're autistic, what can actually help day to day?

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Who wrote Growing Up Autistic?

Niamh Garvey is an autistic author who lives in Cork, Ireland, with her husband, three neurodivergent children, a few hens and some goldfish (which I think tells you everything you need to know about how busy her house is!). She worked as a nurse and has a Diploma in Autism Studies from University College Cork.

The illustrations are by Rebecca Burgess, who is also autistic. Rebecca is an award-winning comic artist based in Bristol whose comics have appeared in The Guardian, and they illustrated Being Autistic too, so the same three lovely characters are back to guide readers through the book.

What's in the book? The full contents list

The book is 192 pages long and split into six parts, so it's very easy to dip in and out of. Here's what's covered:

• Introduction
• Part 1: Coping out and about
  • Making an out and about kit
  • Minding our senses when out and about
  • The not-so-famous other three senses
• Part 2: Making things more predictable
  • Predictability plans
• Part 3: Dealing with feelings
  • Why we need to feel all the feelings
  • The five steps to dealing with feelings
• Part 4: Reacting to uncomfortable feelings
  • Ways to react to uncomfortable feelings
  • Practising the activities that feel good
• Part 5: Balancing our energy throughout the day
  • Energy accounting: costing energy or recharging energy?
• Part 6: Templates

A friendly, no-pressure introduction

I knew I was going to like this book from the very first page. The introduction opens with the three characters reacting to the question of what the book is all about, and one of them very calmly points out that they already know, because they've read the contents page AND the index. I suspect a few of us know a young person exactly like that :)

The author is upfront about the fact that every autistic person is different, and that what helps one autistic person won't help another. So rather than a set of rules, the book offers lots of different ideas, and the reader picks the ones they fancy trying and skips the rest. No magic wand, no 'you must'. Just choices. For our PDAers in particular, that matters a great deal - but more on that below.

Part 1: Coping out and about, and those 'other' senses

The first part introduces the idea about building an 'out and about kit' - a little bag of things that help when the world gets too loud, too bright, too smelly or too much. There are kit ideas for each sense, split into things that soothe and things that block out what's stressful. It's really practical stuff, and it would make a great project to put together with a child before a trip or a new activity.

It was great to see a whole section on what Niamh calls the not-so-famous other three senses. In plain words, these are:

• The inside sense (interoception) - noticing what's going on inside your body, like hunger, thirst, needing the loo or a racing heart.
• The balance sense (the vestibular sense) - knowing which way up you are and how you're moving.
• The body awareness sense (proprioception) - knowing where your body is in space without looking.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing, and I do wish these had been explained to me as simply as this when we first started out on our PDA story. Plenty of the 'behaviour' that gets labelled at school can make a lot more sense once you think about whether someone simply hasn't noticed they're starving, exhausted or desperate for the loo.

Part 2: Making things more predictable

Uncertainty and anxiety go hand in hand for so many autistic people, so this part looks at predictability plans: ways to brainstorm what might happen, plans for meeting basic needs, and other ways to make things feel more predictable.

A little note for fellow PDA parents here. For some PDAers, a plan can itself start to feel like a demand, and that's something to keep an eye on. I was glad to see Niamh includes a section called 'Templates or no templates?', because it leaves room for the young person to decide how much structure actually suits them. Flexibility is the key, and the child is in charge of the plan, not the other way round.

Parts 3 and 4: Dealing with feelings

This is the heart of the book for me. It starts by explaining why we need to feel all of our feelings (including anxiety and anger, which so often get treated as 'bad') before moving on to five steps for dealing with feelings. These go from simply asking yourself whether you feel comfortable or uncomfortable, through to naming the feeling if you can, and choosing how to react.

One particularly interesting step suggestion is the one about collecting 'feeling clues'. Many autistic people find it hard to recognise their own emotions, and Niamh is clear that it's okay if you can't do that yet. The pages below are included in that section and give an example of what the author means:

On the left-hand page, one character spots anxiety because their thoughts keep starting with "what if..." followed by something going wrong (what if I get lost, what if the party is too loud). Another character recognises excitement because the thoughts come thick and fast and are all about nice things. On the right, there's a character bursting with excitement about joining a book club (which, as a book reviewer, I fully approve of!).

Underneath sits a box headed "A thought is just a thought", explaining that having an anxious or unhappy thought doesn't mean it's true, and that having a thought doesn't make you a bad person. I could have written that on a sticky note and stuck it on our fridge years ago. It's such a simple message, but a really powerful one for children who are prone to worry.

Part 4 then gives a long list of ways to react to uncomfortable feelings: breathing activities, movement, humming, singing, music, special interests, nature and fresh air, writing things down, co-regulating with someone else, and simply asking for help. There's also a feelings box and a 'Quick Calm Plan', both of which have templates at the back of the book.

Part 5: Balancing energy through the day

The last main part introduces energy accounting - working out which activities cost energy and which ones recharge it. Niamh asks readers to think of themselves as a "24 hour person", looking at the whole day rather than just the bit at school or college.

I'm a big fan of this approach. So much autistic burnout comes from spending energy all day long on masking and coping, with nothing left in the tank by teatime. Helping a young person see that clearly, without blame, is a really good step towards protecting their wellbeing.

Part 6: Templates you can actually use

The book finishes with templates for an out and about kit, a 'what to expect' plan, a meeting basic needs plan, two breathing activities, a feelings box list, a Quick Calm Plan and energy banking. These are a real bonus for parents and professionals who want something ready to go.

Is Growing Up Autistic suitable for PDAers?

This is not a PDA specific book, nor was it intended to be. I think as parents of PDAers most of us know that it's not possible to make our children like books that we think would be good for them! But I think the tone could make it a good fit for many PDAers. It's gentle, it's visual, it uses lots of humour (key for many PDA children!), and it constantly says 'choose what works for you'. Nothing is presented as a rule.

My one practical tip? Don't hand it over with "I've bought you this to help you"! Leave it lying around on the coffee table and let curiosity do the rest. Low demand works for books too ;)

Who should read Growing Up Autistic?

• Autistic children and young people - it's written to them first and foremost, in a warm, affirming way.
• Parents and carers - reading it alongside your child will give you lots of shared language for senses, feelings and energy.
• Teachers, SENCOs and teaching assistants - the out and about kit and Quick Calm Plan would translate brilliantly into the classroom.
• Occupational therapists, CAMHS workers and other professionals - it would be a great book to recommend to families after diagnosis.

If you've read Being Autistic (And What That Actually Means), this is the natural next step. And if you haven't, I'd honestly recommend getting both.

Where to buy Growing Up Autistic

Growing Up Autistic (finding your way with simple strategies) is available to pre-order now in paperback, ebook and audiobook. You can find it on Amazon or via the publisher.

Being Autistic is already available from Amazon here:

For more books about PDA, click here, and if you have any further questions, please feel free to ask in the comments.

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