Thursday 9 September 2010

Up and Down

Just a quick post tonight to update on how it can all be up and down, even in the same day. Today started off OK, Sasha was happy, but when it was time to take big sister to school Sasha went off to try and put her own shoes on. She picked her 'pirate shoes' (pumps named that because they are red and go with her pirate outfit!!), which have been worn many times before, and which have a velcro strap across the top to hold them on. Sasha tried to put these on without undoing the straps, and managed to do so for one foot, but when it came to the other she realised she just couldn't do it.
Of course at the first signs of distress I offered to help, but no, she wanted to do it herself. And so she carried on battling, and got more and more upset when she couldn't and each time I offered to help the screams got worse (no mummy help!) and poor Tamsin was sitting waiting on the stairs with her hands over her ears. 

There was not much I could do, until it got to the point where Sasha was so upset that she threw the shoes off and eventually let me hold her and cuddle to calm down - but then she refused any other shoes or help. So I had to carry her to the car without her shoes on, and quietly throw her sandals in without her seeing. By the time we got to school she was fine again, and I managed to slide her sandals on without protest.
In fact after school drop off for our eldest Sasha suggested going to the shops in town, not usually her favourite past-time, and we had a lovely hour just wandering round with no pressure and brilliant behaviour - she even asked to go to a food shop, specifically for bananas, and then promptly ate 2! It's unheard of for my children to request good food as a rule :)

We then went on to a new music session which I'd said I would give a trial. I'm a bit nervous about organised sessions as Sasha doesn't enjoy being told what to do, but she does love music so I thought we should be brave and give it a whirl. The session went OK, Sasha's behaviour was fine, but she didn't really join in with the teacher that much - largely due to the big mirrors in the ballet studio which she thoroughly enjoyed watching herself dance in!

After lunch I developed a migraine and Sasha continued to be brilliant - I had to lie down and she didn't complain at all, just took herself off to her own bed and had a sleep, which was perfect for me. After school pick up both girls were very good, playing together nicely and eating tea, and despite no husband to help, bedtime went remarkably well with stories together. Sasha really didn't want me to leave her tonight though - usually after lying down with her for a couple of minutes she will let me say good night and go, although I'm sure she doesn't sleep til quite late, but tonight she didn't want me to go, kept requesting me to lie down again and cried if I tried to leave. But all in all a good day, despite the not-so-happy start.

Back to nursery for her tomorrow, first time since her huge outburst on Tuesday, so I'm a bit nervous about how she will go in. Fingers crossed there's no crying....

To find out more about our experiences, please check out our 'About Us' page. If you are looking for more information on Pathological Demand Avoidance, the posts below may help.

What is PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)?

Ten things you need to know about Pathological Demand Avoidance

Does my child have Pathological Demand Avoidance?

The difference between PDA and ODD

Strategies for PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)

Pathological Demand Avoidance: Strategies for Schools

Challenging Behaviour and PDA

Is Pathological Demand Avoidance real?

Autism with demand avoidance or Pathological Demand Avoidance?

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